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If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by all the curly hair rules online, you’re not alone. In this guide, I break down the most common curly hair rules — and share which ones I actually follow and which ones I break.
Every curly girl knows the internet is full of “rules” — do this, don’t do that, never touch your hair, only wash once a week, avoid sulfates forever… honestly? It’s exhausting. Because if you’ve been in the curly world long enough, you already know one truth: There is no universal rule for curly hair care. Only what works for your specific curl pattern.
So today, I’m breaking down the most common curly hair rules — and telling you exactly which ones I follow… and which ones I happily break without guilt. And the best part? Your curls will survive. Mine did. ❀
The Most Common Curly Hair Rules (And What I Actually Do)
Rule #1: No Sulfates, No Silicones, No Mineral Oils
The classic Curly Girl Method commandments.
The theory: Sulfates can be drying, silicones need clarifying shampoo to remove, and mineral oils block moisture from penetrating the hair shaft.
What I do: I avoid them most of the time, but I don’t freak out if a product has one of these ingredients. Do I avoid them most of the time? Yes. Do I panic if a product contains a gentle sulfate? Nope.
My rule: If something leaves my hair soft, moisturized, and shiny…I use it. Results matter more than ingredient lists.
Pro tip: If you do use silicones, clarify monthly to prevent buildup. Simple as that.
Rule #2: Don’t Wash More Than Once a Week
Some curls thrive on once-a-week wash days. Others? Absolutely not.
The theory: Frequent washing strips natural oils and causes dryness.
What I do: I wash depending on my mood, workouts, product buildup, and how my scalp feels. Winter = twice a week. Summer = every other day sometimes.
Your scalp health > arbitrary wash day rules. If your scalp is itchy, oily, or uncomfortable, wash it. Healthy hair starts with a healthy scalp.
Rule #3: Never Detangle Dry Hair
Usually true — dry detangling can cause breakage and damage your curl pattern. But listen…
What I do: On lazy days, I absolutely finger-detangle my dry curls before throwing them in a bun or pineapple.
Is it perfect? No. But it saves me from ripping through massive knots on wash day. And my hair is still thriving.
Balance is key — not rigid rules. Use a lightweight oil or leave-in conditioner if you need to detangle dry, and always be gentle.
Rule #4: Always Deep Condition
This one I follow religiously.
Dry curls? Struggling definition? Frizz taking over? A 10–20 minute deep conditioning treatment fixes 80% of my hair problems.
Why it works: Curly hair is naturally drier because sebum (your scalp’s natural oil) has trouble traveling down the spiral shaft. Deep conditioning restores moisture, improves elasticity, and enhances curl definition.
No fancy bathroom spa day needed — even a quick 15-minute deep conditioner with heat works wonders.
Best for: Low porosity, high porosity, damaged curls, color-treated hair — basically everyone.
Rule #5: Protect Your Hair at Night
Do I always remember my satin bonnet or silk pillowcase? …Absolutely not.
Some nights I crash with semi-wet hair, no bonnet, looking like a lion the next morning. But consistency beats perfection. When I remember? My curls look 10x better — less frizz, more definition, better day-two hair.
My advice: Keep a satin scrunchie or bonnet on your nightstand. Even protecting your hair 4 nights out of 7 makes a difference.
Rule #6: Don’t Touch Your Hair Too Much
Ha! Impossible.
I’m a mom, I’m busy, I’m constantly adjusting my curls — I touch them all day. But here’s my compromise: I avoid touching them while they dry. After that? I fluff, scrunch, and adjust like there’s no tomorrow.
Why this matters: Touching wet curls causes frizz and disrupts clumping. But once your hair is 100% dry? Touch away. Your curls can handle it.
So What’s the Real Rule for Curly Hair?
Honestly? It’s this:
Do what works for your curls — and do it consistently.
Curly hair care isn’t about perfection. It’s about experimenting, adapting, and learning what your unique curl pattern needs over time. Some rules serve you; others just stress you out.
When I stopped obsessing over following every curly “commandment,” my hair actually got healthier, easier to manage, and more predictable. I stopped chasing someone else’s curl definition and started appreciating my own.
I learned that curly hair rules are helpful, but listening to your hair matters more.
So yeah, I break rules. And my curls are still soft, happy, and growing. Yours will be too. ♡
Tell Me in the Comments
Which curly hair rule do you break without regret? Let’s normalize real-life curly hair care — not unrealistic hair perfection.
Want to try a routine that works for me? Check out my 3-step curly routine.
📌 Want more simple curly routines, hair growth tips, and beginner-friendly guides? Explore the blog or follow me on Pinterest where I share daily curl inspiration and product recommendations. ♡
